ExQuse Me?
by mistyfur
Summary: A morning briefing gets interupted by visit from our favorite mischief maker, Q. A visit that can only mean trouble for Kathryn and Chakotay.


**Disclaimers:** Paramount Studios owes them. I just make them fool around with each. ;)

A big thank you goes out to Elem for taking the time to beta this for me. Without her input, I would have missed all those pesky typos, grammar errors and missing words in a sentence.

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**Kathryn Janeway's Personal Log**

**Have you ever woken up and wanted nothing more than to crawl**

**back under the covers, hoping that the outside world would just**

**disappear? This has been one of those of weeks of hell. If I didn't**

**know better I would say that Voyager was testing me to see how**

**much more pressure I can take before I bite off some poor**

**crewmember's head.**

**It started with Neelix and his 'even better than coffee' substitute. Why did**

**the replicators have to be the first thing to go at the beginning of**

**this week? I've been forcing myself to drink that sludge he calls coffee**

**for the past six days and things have steadily gone down hill from there.**

**If I hear about one more malfunction, heads are going to roll.**

**It's been one thing after another, as Voyager seems to be falling to**

**pieces around us. No matter what repairs B'Elanna and I try to do,**

**nothing seems to work. Every time we fix something, a spark goes off**

**and another system crashes. Endless, unproductive hours spent in**

**Voyager's underbelly hasn't improved my temper, or hers.**

**And to top things off, I was handed a padd with a reminder from the Doctor**

**for my annual physical. Like I need him to tell me that I drink too much**

**coffee, I'm too stressed and I don't get enough exercise, blah blah blah.**

**If I get one more smirk from him, I'm decompiling his program and**

**scattering it into a million pieces.**

**If things don't improve soon, I won't be held responsible for my actions…**

**End Personal Log**

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Kathryn Janeway marched into the conference room, with a scowl on her face and a pile of padds spilling from her arms. With a small growl, she dumped them in front of Chakotay before falling into her seat at the head of the table. Her icy blue eyes roamed over the tense faces of her senior staff. Narrowing her eyes, she watched as Harry flinched under her piercing stare.

"Report!" She barked, hiding a smirk as Neelix suppressed a yelp. "B'Elanna?"

B'Elanna met her stare head on, refusing to back down from her penetrating look.

"Captain, the warp core still isn't at peak levels and we've discovered microfractures along the outer casing. We need to re-enforce them before they become larger and cause a warp core breach." B'Elanna replied with a grimace, "If we keep pushing it, things are only going to go down hill."

"Recommendations?" Janeway asked, dreading the answer already. She knew she wasn't going to like what B'Elanna was going to say.

"Find an M-class planet and land the ship. Voyager's taken some heavy hits recently and we need to fix the minor damage before we're dead in the water."

Janeway turned to Seven.

"I can not comply, Captain." Seven answered coolly, watching as a twitch started along the Captain's eyelid. "There are no M-class planets in the vicinity."

Janeway stood up, and placed her hands on the surface of the table. She leaned down sweeping her gaze over them. "Everyone, I want this to be a top priority. Seven, Ensign Kim, continuous scans until we find what we're looking for." She ordered, and sat back down. "Tom?"

"Navigation systems are sluggish. Voyager just isn't responding as quickly as usual, and with any course changes I input there's a three percent deviation." Tom said, looking pointedly towards B'Elanna as he added, "Someone is going to have to have a look at it."

"I'll add it to the list, Helmboy." B'Elanna muttered under her breath, as she added another item to the rapidly growing repair list.

"Anything else?" Chakotay asked, shaking his head at the state that they were in.

He could feel Kathryn's frustration rising with each item that was brought up in the brief meeting.

Looking at her, his eyes noted the tense shoulders, the tiny lines of worry along her mouth and the dark circles under her eyes. Her fingers grasped the edge of the table tightly and she looked ready to snap at the next person that spoke. Under the cover of the table, he reached out and caressed her thigh with a soothing touch. He felt her relax just the little from his touch and a small, secretive smile appeared briefly before she quickly resumed her stern visage.

"Umm, Commander," Neelix called out hesitantly, "I was taking inventory this morning and I noticed that food supplies are getting low. Especially the Leola root, and you know how popular it is with the crew."

Chakotay held back a strangled laugh at Neelix's upset expression. "Neelix, the crew will have to adjust to a lack of Leola root until we can locate another supply." He hid a shudder at the thought of more of that repulsive root being brought on board.

"How is that possible? I thought we had a never-ending supply on hand. Doesn't it just grow like unwanted weeds? And didn't we just resupply three weeks ago? You haven't been indulging too much, have you, Commander?" Janeway teased, her eyes sparkling with mirth. Hidden from everyone's eyes, her tiny foot nudged his, before sliding teasingly up and down his calf. She looked at him from lowered lids, and was delighted to see him shift uncomfortably in his seat. Whether he was trying to get closer or move away from her, she wasn't quite sure. But it served him right for daring to start something during the meeting.

"No, Captain. I've left that for the good of the crew." Chakotay said hoarsely, his body reacting to her as he struggled to focus on the conversation around him. Not an easy task when Kathryn was in a playful mood.

"Thanks Chief, you shouldn't have," Paris mumbled under his breath, flinching when B'Elanna kicked him under the table. "What?"

"Shh!" B'Elanna hissed, watching the Captain and Chakotay, sensing that something was going on, but not sure what.

"Captain, I've also noticed that we lost all the food stored in three of the refrigeration units." Neelix continued, ignoring the mumbled comments of the senior staff. "The power supply must have surged and super heated the units over night. Everything was spoiled."

Janeway raised a hand to her forehead trying to massage away the oncoming migraine.

"This is just great. Can anything else go wrong on this damn ship this month?" Janeway demanded, her tone peeved and her other hand tapping out a furious pattern on the table.

As if the universe responded to her query, a bright white flash filled the briefing room and an irate gasp came from the Captain's direction. All turned to her, and blinked at the bright light. Their mouths fell open in stunned disbelief, except for Seven, who merely arched her eyebrow at a sight never before seen on Voyager. With an egotistical smirk, Q held the furious figure of their Captain snuggly on his lap. With one hand over her knee and the other one on her hip, he looked down into her murderous eyes.

Chakotay had risen from his seat, his face flushing darkly and his fists clenched at Q's impudence. Only a sharp nod from Janeway stopped him from confronting Q.

"You called, Kathy darling," Q purred, his hands kneading her flesh.

"Am I wearing a sign that says 'kick me'?" Janeway asked, looking at her senior staff with an exasperated glance.

They stared at her, lost for words.

"And stop copping a feel Q, before I break your hand and I tell your Mate about this recent insanity of yours." She barked sharply.

B'Elanna snickered as Q stopped his movements and his smirk diminished at Janeway's threat.

"What the hell do you want this time, Q?" She challenged, trying to escape from his embrace.

"Can't I pay a surprise visit to my favorite Starfleet Captain without everyone thinking that I have a hidden motive?" Q asked with a pout, still smarting from Janeway's earlier comment.

"No," Janeway snapped. "These surprise visits of yours always have a hidden agenda. What is it this time? Has your mate kicked you out or did the Continuum finally realize what a pain you really are?"

"Kathy, you wound me with such accusations," Q gasped loudly, shaking his head at her mistrust. "When have I ever come here under false pretenses?"

"Do you really need examples?" Janeway asked, incredulous at his selective memory.

"Never mind," Q muttered.

"Let me go, Q." Each icy word was spoken slowly and deliberately.

"Love to but I'm not going to, Kathy," Q replied, waving off her request and smirking down at her flushed features. "I've decided that you're becoming too stressed and a stick in the mud. Chuckles here, obviously hasn't been doing a very good job lately."

"Commander Chakotay," she stressed, "has been taking care of things excellently. Not that we have to explain our command structure to you. After all you are omnipotent and we're just minor bipedals. What's your point, Q?"

"Well, it's like this. The last time I stopped by your bed was empty, unlike the last few times when I've tried to visit. I didn't want to interrupt. I know how silly you humans can be during certain times, especially when they're doing what you and Chuckles were." Q announced nonchalantly, ignoring the sharply inhaled breaths of everyone in the small room. "I never took you for a screamer, Kathy. A moaner or a gasper maybe, but then Chuckles was really putting on a command performance."

"Q!" Janeway and Chakotay's horrified shout filled the air. But they were too late to stop Q blurting out their secret.

They refrained from looking at the senior staff, not wanting to see the shocked looks on their faces at Q's revelation. They could picture everyone's reaction and they cringed as the images seared into their minds. Seven would be expressionless except for a highly arched brow. Neelix would be smiling in delight that they were together and already planning a congratulations party to celebrate their union. Harry would bright red with embarrassment, looking anywhere except at them, and desperate to purge the thought of them in that position from his mind. B'Elanna would be looking at Chakotay with a threatening expression, mad because he hadn't told her himself. And Paris, cocky and full of plots Paris, would be smirking at them gleefully.

Overall not something they wanted to deal with, especially since they had managed to keep their relationship under wraps since their return from New Earth. It had been a private, cherished union, which gave them strength to face each day. Private, until Q had barged in and exposed it to everyone.

"Q, be glad that you have your powers," Chakotay growled, his hands aching to wrap around Q's neck and choke the smug expression off his face. His anger was visible for all to see. "Otherwise, I would take you apart for this."

"Get in line, Chakotay." Janeway added.

Q looked at the two of them, and a bored look crossed his features. "Did I say something wrong? Did I spoil you're little surprise?"

"Get off my ship and don't come back for at least ten years, Q." Janeway ordered.

"We'll see." Q said, pressing a kiss on her lips before disappearing in a flash. She dropped back onto her chair as his voice came out of nowhere to taunt her one more time. "You both really need to relax. Have fun Kathy and Chuckles."

Without looking at her crew and hoping no one comment on Q revelation, Janeway called out, "Alright everyone, dismissed."

She heard the chairs pushing away from the table and their hurried footsteps as they moved towards the door. She glanced at Chakotay and shook her head as he was about to speak. 'Later,' she mouthed silently, smiling at him.

"Captain?" Paris and B'Elanna called out from the doorway.

"Yes, Lieutenants?" Janeway asked in a cool voice, daring them to say anything.

"We just want to say congratulations to you both," B'Elanna replied with a wink.

"Yep, congratulations," Paris echoed mischievously. "And you are so busted!"

They burst out laughing at the embarrassed command team before rushing out of the room.

Chakotay rose and pulled her into his arms. His head rested on her auburn hair, and his breath gently stirred the locks. Reaching down, he tilted her head up to his to meet his loving gaze.

"The cat's out of the bag, Kathryn," he murmured, his hand cupping her face and his thumb caressing along her cheek before brushing lightly over her lips. "No more secret rendezvous."

"No more sneaking back out of my quarters in the middle of the night," she added, as her fingertips traced over his tattoo, before tangling in his dark hair. With a tug, she pulled him closer to her. "Now all we have to do is deal with all the looks and comments from our crew. Paris is going to be a problem, as usual. But it's nothing we can't handle together. I give it about a week and things should calm down."

"What happens after that week? Does that mean you're going to be even more demanding than before?" Chakotay asked, holding himself an inch away from her parted lips.

"Of course," she replied cheekily, laughing softly at his lecherous groan.

Kathryn rose up on her toes and captured his mouth in a soul searing, breathtaking kiss, which he readily returned. They lost track of time as they reaffirmed their love, pouring everything that they felt for one and another into that one earth-shattering kiss. She pulled away reluctantly but her hands wrapped around his broad shoulders, keeping him flush against her.

"You don't mind serving under me, do you Chakotay?" Kathryn teased, her breathing ragged.

"I wouldn't have it any other way," Chakotay replied with a dimpled grin, his hands locking around her waist, and breathing in deeply her intoxicating scent of roses and essence of Kathryn.

"Neither would I," she said, snuggling close to him, and resting her head against his chest. Her hand slid down his chest to lay over his heart.

"I love you, Kathryn," Chakotay murmured. "And as much as I could kill Q right now, I'm glad that it's out in the open. I can finally hold you, kiss you and flirt shamelessly with you, without anyone muttering about each incident."

"I'm glad too but I hope that the crew doesn't object to our being together. I love you too much to let you go now," she replied fiercely.

"They won't object, Kathryn," Chakotay said solemnly.

"Why?" Kathryn asked curiously.

"Didn't you know that there are betting pools about our getting together?" Chakotay asked, surprised that the crew had managed to pull one over her after all these years.

"Of course, I did. How do you think I always had rations for my coffee addiction over the years?" Kathryn exclaimed playfully.

"I thought you stole them from me,' Chakotay said, shaking his head at her. "You bet on us?"

"I always bet on a sure thing. And Chakotay, we are a sure thing," she whispered, confident of his love.

"Yes, we are," he agreed, pulling her closer for another kiss.

As they became lost within each other, a small flash deposited an envelope on the table beside them.

'**Kathy,**

**Since I caused so much trouble for you and Chuckles. I've decided to fix your ship**

**and restock the food supplies. Especially that Leola root that Chuckles**

**is so fond of.**

**Until we met again.'**

**Q**

**The End**

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End file.
